Writing for 14 June 2009(12:30pm)....

I came home in the Morning today around 7+am . after talking and more talking.. i send my friend back home at 5+am and i when to a lonely walk and EMO time . there is jus too many things inside my heart and things are not jus what ppl were thinking, there is things that i dun think i need to tell anyone i know that keeping inside my heart all this is so stupid and slowly i may turn more EMO then ever but i jus think tat i should jus keep it to myself . i dun want to share and i dun want it to be known by others . ppl say sharing ur problems with others will be better so that someone can help u carry some of ur problems, but for me i dun want others to take what i am facing . i dun want others to know that my life is so full of problems . everytime i'm jus holding a smile jus to hide my unhappyness face . somehow i'm sick and tired of putting a fake smile whenever i'm going ...

Ya i may be joking around and looks that i'm so super cheer with life, but do anyone knw that when i reach home i'm tearsing ? somethime i jus wanna turn off myself and SLEEP till everything is forgotten? all my pain and stress i will only share it to samantha and now pain and stress i will share it to myself.

i'm not those that i will tell everyone that i know HOW stress and sad i am de . i will jus tell SOME of them 1/1000 of the stress i'm having. and i always make sure that i tell the right thing so that the others dun know .

samantha says that she will be coming at 1pm plus to ask me for some help .. and i will be waiting thats all i will say .


i think the friend of my that was with me from 10+pm to 5+am should knw.
yesterday i jus can't hold to my tears, and i break down for awhile!!!

ended at 1:01pm....